093jd

I am bruised, and I hate admitting it. Hate saying that a little of me is soft, or unsure.

But I am. I don;t have a 5 year plan. I hardly have a 5 day plan. I don;t think we have to. Being alive is taking things as they come, not planning each momentous occasion. Technically, I'm a grown up but I have no idea what I want to be.

I'm lost. And I feel like I'm the only one big enough to admit I have no fucking clue whats happening next. I'm in it for the ride because control is not realistic.

All I know? I like learning, and i'll continue to learn.

Hate

I'm terrified of falling in love, because I know it won't work. You hear all these stories about true love and happily ever after, but its all bullshit. Because even if people stay together, its never happily ever after. Its just after. Sooner or later, someone will break, emotions will change, and then you're eighty, dying and cursing your spouse.

It never works. He'll always leave, one way or another. And its always the woman who loses. Its always her left broken hearted while he walks away indifferenty, looking for the next unsuspecting girl with a tight shirt.

I hate being so dependent on assholes who only think with their dicks. I hate being a girl. We always lose. Always.